RECENTLY, I read an article that blew me away.
Monique van der Vorst from the Netherlands is a 27-year-old silver-medal winning Paralympian who had been confined to a wheelchair for 14 years.
She had been an athletic kid who excelled in tennis and hockey when a routine ankle operation resulted in nerve damage and left one leg paralysed from the hip down.
Most people would consider it a terrible tragedy — to lose the use of a leg because of an accident in the operating room.
It wasn’t reported whether Monique, at 13 years old, mourned the loss of her leg, but it was clear that after the incident, she took up handcycling and competed nationally and internationally.
She won six European and three world championship titles, reported The Sunday Telegraph.
I gaped in horror when I read that in 2008, Monique was hit by a car. Her spinal cord was damaged and left her completely paralysed from the waist down.
Anyone would have thought it incredibly tragic and unfair that life could get so much worse for someone so young and brave.
Yet, later that year, Monique won two silver medals at the Beijing Paralympic Games.
I was sitting there on the couch, reading this incredible piece of news and feeling in absolute awe of this woman who is only a year younger than I am.
Then I got to the part where she got into another accident, in 2010. She was training on her handcycle when another cyclist hit her hard.
Again, she was back at the hospital.
And what can only be described as a miracle happened — she started feeling sensations in her legs.
Over the next few days, Monique was able to stand. Within a few months, she was able to walk.
“After an accident in 2010, my body started to change. After a long and hard rehab period, I am back on my feet again. For me, a new competition has started now,” she wrote on her website.
It was reported that Monique has swapped her hand-bike for a regular model and has started racing competitively.
She told The Sunday Telegraph that she does not expect to be strong enough to take part in the 2012 Olympics in London, but her goal is to cycle for the Netherlands in 2016 — as an able-bodied cyclist.
At this point, I could not help but think, “Wow. If it was me, I would never have been able to overcome such odds with courage and spirit.”
Then I remembered something that my aunt had once said when someone told her they admired her ability to raise a child on her own while working and that they couldn’t possibly do it.
“How do you know you won’t be able do it?”
Anger, frustration, tears and despair — these are emotions that many of us associate with the inability to do something.
Feelings and emotions are part of being human, but they are not what define us.
For example, someone may feel inadequate that he can’t make more money, but it does not make him an inadequate person.
One may feel frustrated at not being able to walk, but it does not make you a frustrated person.
The one thing that defines us is our mind. Sometimes, we make the mistake of thinking that our minds want something when it is our emotions that shout for it.
When we allow our emotions to take over our minds, we often think of ourselves as the victim.
When we see ourselves as the victim, it is only natural to helpless. Instead of trying our best to get out of a despairing situation, we think that we deserve better.
After trying briefly, we get even more upset that the situation has not turned around. It’s like saying “Why is life so unfair? It’s not like I didn’t try!”
I do not think Monique van der Vorst saw herself as a victim when she was paralysed. And if there ever was a secret to achieving great things, Monique probably had it down when she wrote on her website:
“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude, but don’t complain…”
When we complain about something, it means that our minds have not found a solution to the problem, or that we have not overcome it.
If we’re complaining about the same thing day after day, it means we’re dwelling on it. When we are living in the past, we are not taking full advantage of the present.
I do not think for a moment that it was easy for Monique to overcome her emotions and strive to achieve what most would consider impossible.
I am sure she had moments where she felt like quitting. I am sure there were times where she gave in to her emotions and wept at the pain and unfairness of it all.
If you are climbing a steep and treacherous hill, there will be moments where your shoes will get caught in rocks and you’ll stumble. Moments where you feel so tired you have to stop and catch your breath.
If you are with a group of people climbing this hill, you will see some turning back the way they came, thinking that there is no way they would be able to get to the top.
You will see some simply stopping, happy that they have managed to climb this far but do not feel like they need to go further.
Some will rest for a while and trudge on. They will fall and get up. When it rains, they climb slower or wait out the storm before heading upwards.
All three kinds of people are like you and me, normal human beings who make our own choices in life.
When it comes right down to it, it matters little how good your shoes and climbing equipment are, and sometimes, even how experienced a hill climber you are, because the power of the mind overrides any physical and emotional challenge or pain.
People who achieve the unbelievable have incredibly strong minds, which they train and exercise conantly.
If we do not allow our emotions and ego to control our mind, we are never paralysed. We will never be the victim; nor will we be helpless.
Towards the end of the article I was reading, Monique said in the interview:
“Do I believe this is a miracle? I don’t know. I do believe there is something.”
“But I don’t believe you can sit back and wait for miracles. You have to believe in yourself.”
